Mismatches
by D.Kinney
Summary: Jasper faces the dreadful truth—he may have lost Edward for good. Edward's had a tough time after being shoved out of the closet. That fact made him act like an asshole around people who could also hurt him. He could never imagine Jasper would be one to do it, though. Is it true time heals all wounds? AH, Slash, keep away if you are underage.
1. Chapter 1

**AN**/ Here it is, people! A short one! Not short enough to be a one-shot, though. It's just a little bit angsty. Poor Jasper is a mess. I would be if I were in his shoes! Who'd like losing Edward? Let's see how this goes.

As usual, the story is pre-written, pre-read by my bestie** Lisa-FanFicCrazy**, and pre-betaed by dearest **sue273. **So, hopefully, we won't have any problems posting it weekly.

I hope you all enjoy it!

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**Chapter 1**

"Edward's guy asked him to move in..."

"What?" Jasper's eyes were wide in disbelief as he lifted his face from his hands, looking Emmett in the eyes.

"Already? How long have they been together? Two weeks?" Jasper's hands flew to the air. He was so loud, Emmett jumped in his chair.

"Five months," Emmett answered apologetically, sporting an ugly grimace as he corrected his friend and brother-in-law.

Jasper bit his bottom lip looking away from Emmett, his eyes almost watering; he was feeling weak and stupid for the sentiments he still nourished for his ex. He wanted to cry and scream, and break something, maybe. He felt so foolish, but so powerless at the same time.

Since he'd known Edward was dating another guy, he thought it was his fault. He'd been such a loser! Such a coward ass! But feeling bad about himself only made him feel worse about Edward.

"Edward is an asshole," Jasper commented, trying to fake a calm he was far from feeling as he rubbed his face on his forearm in an attempt to wipe the tears that stubbornly slid down his right cheek.

"We all know he is. He was never an asshole to you, though. And we all know why he's the way he is," Emmett reasoned. "Being outed the way he was is nobody's first choice. Having parents like his is punishment for a whole life's worth of being an asshole. But he was never a shitty person to you."

Jasper knew Emmett had a point. Edward had all the reason to be mad at the world.

_As a freshman in college he was attacked by a group of gay-bashers while kissing his date on the lips in an enclosed area in a park. _

_Both ended up in the hospital, where his parents heard the whole story from the cops. _

_As they walked into Edward's hospital room, their disappointment was written all over their faces. His mother's tears showed some compassion, but she wouldn't even hold his hand. His father wouldn't look him in the eye. _

_Edward's jaw was bruised pretty badly so he couldn't talk. He could only hear his father's harsh words informing him they hadn't raised a son for him to turn into a faggot. He said his investments in Edward's future were to be repaid with a successful future, a wife and grandchildren. He made it clear Edward needed to be a MAN to remain in his family, otherwise he'd be out._

_His father asked him once more if he would insist on that ridiculous charade of being a fag and, feeling like dying inside, Edward only nodded. He couldn't fight against his own feelings; he couldn't pretend to be someone he was not. He'd done that for years, and he'd had enough; he was tired of pretending._

_His parents ended up deserting him, paying the hospital bill, but cutting him loose, not even agreeing to pay for the rest of his college education. They said they were so humiliated and frustrated to have raised someone for so long, having that as repayment—an aberration. _

_Edward was taken in by Emmett, who let him sleep at his dorm room floor until he found a job and both of them found a place they could afford close to campus. _

_Edward had to quit college for a long time, first working wherever he could—constructions, coffee shops, waiting tables at restaurants._

_He also bulked up at the gym, having promised himself he would never be caught by surprise like that night, or be weak and not able to defend himself again. _

_For years, he only worked to save money enough for college, even renting his own room at the apartment he shared with Emmett and two others, sleeping on a mattress on the living room floor. _

_Edward learned to trust nobody—except for Emmett. _

_Years had gone by and Edward finally went back to college, working at night as a bouncer in Emmett's club so he could study during the day. He was the head of security, and Emmett's most trusted person there._

"You fucked up pretty badly, you know… showing up at my wedding with that Bella person." Emmett broke the silence. Jasper grimaced shaking his head as if trying to shake those memories away.

"By the way, I never asked you, but WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT?" Emmett went on leaning back on his chair, raising his hands in an exasperated move.

Jasper kept shaking his head no, faster now, pursing his lips as if incapable of explaining.

"I still can't believe that, you know… Bella?" Emmett shot his brows up, shaking his head a bit.

"I needed a date…" Jasper breathed, trying to find a good excuse for his behavior.

"You had a date… you had Edward."

"We had agreed we would go separately. How the fuck am I getting out of the fucking closet at my only sister's wedding? Rose would've killed me!" Jasper's voice went a tone higher trying to make his point.

"Okay… I can give you that. But you didn't have to bring a beard, Jasper—especially her." Emmett lowered his voice as he bowed his head, shaking it sideways a bit.

_Jasper's ex-girlfriend, Bella, was a constant reason for his fights with Edward when they were together. Jasper had broken up with her to be with Edward and was terrified of her seeing them together in a compromising situation—she would out him for sure._

"I needed to bring a date. My dad would find it weird if I didn't. All the other girls I know knew I was with Edward. It would be a mess if I had asked one of them!"

He had not convinced Emmett yet.

"You know how difficult it was for him to trust you? To open up to you and show you who he really is?" Emmett asked, but Jasper couldn't look at him and say a word. "Did you know…" Emmett shook his head before sighing and trying again. "I know what I'm going to say is so private I shouldn't be mentioning it. Edward told me in a drunken state sometime after you two split. He said you didn't know, but I think you should so you can understand what a huge deal you meant to him."

Jasper looked at Emmett a bit confused—he always thought Edward held no secrets from him.

"Did you know… Fuck… Did you know you were the only man he ever bottomed for?"

Jasper's eyes went wide at the revelation. He never knew. He thought Edward bottomed for him because that was what he liked. He shook his head no, but kept his eyes trained at Emmett's, waiting for more information.

"From the beginning of your thing with him, he knew you had just realized you liked men. He was willing to let you get used to being with him. After some time, he tried but you didn't let him near your… you know, near you, so he never tried again hoping one day you'd ask him to."

Jasper lowered his head and buried his face in his hands. He'd always been afraid of talking about that with Edward. He was never open that way.

"Have you got any idea how hard it was for him to stay there as my best man, standing by my side at the altar while you were sitting on a bench with Bella all over you?"

Jasper still couldn't look Emmett in the eye.

"Ridiculous public display of … whatever 'cause that was not affection for sure, by the way."

Jasper started shivering; the memories from that evening after the wedding reception running him over like a freight train.

_Edward hadn't spoken a word to him during the reception. His eyes were dead. He was polite and pleasant with everyone around him, but there was no spark in his beautiful forest greens. _

_Jasper couldn't wait to get home and explain himself. _

_They had agreed to go as friends. The night before the wedding, the whole family gathered at the hotel where the reception would be so as to enjoy the rare moments they had together. _

_Jasper's mom had arranged for Bella to be invited in an attempt to get them back together. She was worried since it had been almost a year and Jasper hadn't introduced them to a new girlfriend. She made him agree to go with Bella, since he was currently unattached. _

_Jasper couldn't say no; he had no plausible reason not to take her as a date. He tried! He said she would be in the way and would prevent him from meeting a nice girl. "Women become more interested when a man has company," was his mother's counter-argument. _

_He had no way out of it. Edward wouldn't answer the phone so he could explain it to him. The next morning was too busy and when he realized, he was in church with Bella attached to his arm. _

_Once he'd seen Edward moving to the exit, he left the party, too. As he walked inside Edward's apartment, he found the place a complete mess. His boyfriend had started throwing everything he had left there onto the floor next to the front door. The beast was loose once he was away from the public eye—Edward was red with fury. _

_Jasper tried calling his name but he wouldn't have any of it. _

_Edward raised a hand demanding Jasper to stop, saying "Save it! Just get your shit and get lost!" As Jasper started trying to talk again, Edward shouted, "JUST FUCKING GET YOUR SHIT AND GET THE FUCK OUT!"_

_Jasper could see the tears trying to pour from Edward's eyes. His fingertips itched to reach for his man, but before he could move, Edward vanished to his room._

_Jasper waited and waited. Edward wouldn't come out, so he walked in after him. He found Edward's bedroom door locked from the inside. He knocked once and had no answer. He tried again twice before Edward walked up to the door to unlock it, leaving it open for Jasper to walk in as he sat on his bed._

_As Jasper paced a little closer to Edward, he tried apologizing but Edward wouldn't allow it. He just shook his head no, cutting him off. "I'm tired of being the reason for people to be ashamed of me."_

_Jasper rushed to him and knelt at Edward's feet in a pleading position. "Edward! I love you! You know I do! Since the very first time I laid my eyes on you, you know I loved you! This was just a misunderstanding! She means nothing to me! You are my … my everything, you know you are! When was I ever ashamed of you, baby?" _

_Edward stood up with a sarcastic smile on his face and walked around the room. "All the freaking time! You aren't ashamed of me when we are here or at Emmett's and maybe in different gay places we go, but you are ashamed of me where we could possibly meet anyone who knows you and your family!" _

_Jasper stood up and tried walking towards Edward, but met his raised hand warning him to stay away before he could do it. _

"_Edward… you know I'm not out yet. You promised me you wouldn't rush me." _

_Edward moved fast in Jasper's direction, looking so menacing he frightened Jasper, making him pace backwards until he hit the wall. "I know I promised you that. But when will you ever be ready?" Edward said pressing himself against Jasper, trapping him between his body and the concrete._

_Jasper could taste Edward's breath on his tongue he was so close. He leaned his face forward and his lips touched Edward's. On a different occasion, that would have settled the matter. _

_Not this time. _

_Edward kissed him back furiously, bruising his lips, scraping his tongue with his teeth, pushing Jasper against the wall so harshly it was painful. But as he stopped, still trapping Jasper against the wall, he repeated the same words, "Now, get your shit and get lost." _

_Edward moved away from Jay, sighed and continued, "You will never admit you're gay… I will always be this… It's not enough for me. Just… just go." _

_Edward went into his en-suite bathroom. _

_Jasper felt defeated. Edward was the first man, the first person, the only one he ever loved. He had changed his life completely so he could make Edward happy. Edward, on the other hand, told him he could take all the time he needed to come out. He never thought he'd lose Edward over this. Jasper ended up leaving, and never saw Edward again._

"Did he say yes?"Jasper snapped.

"What?" Emmett asked confused, already focusing on something else.

"Did Edward accept the guy's invitation to move in?"

Emmett shook his head but didn't really answer Jasper's question, "I don't know why I told you that. I shouldn't have." He stood up from his chair in an attempt to run from the situation, but Jasper didn't leave it alone.

"Tell me… he didn't, did he? Tell me!" he went on insisting, walking after Emmett to his office.

"Edward asked me to tell you… That's why I did it. He asked me so you would know before he actually moved in with the guy. He hasn't said yes… yet."

Jasper's eyes lit up as his smile spread on his face.

"No… no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no! NO! You are NOT going to blow this for him. You are NOT going to look for him! This guy is the best thing that ever happened to him! He's older, he loves Edward to death and Edward is crazy about Garrett's daughter! The guy introduced him to his family as his boyfriend! Not a friend! Not a colleague from wherever, but as his boyfriend! The man he loves! Do you understand? If you screw this up for him, I'll never forgive you, Jasper. I mean it!" Emmett growled. Jasper's smile faded. "What the fuck have you got to offer him? Huh? A life deep back in your closet with you? Do you really think that after all he's been through he deserves such a life? Don't be selfish enough to bring him down with you to your miserable half-lived life, Jasper. Edward's been working hard to get back on his feet after having everything taken away from him," Emmett finished.

Jasper was wide-eyed at Emmett's reaction to the short-lived hint of hope Jasper had flickering in his eyes. He knew Emmett was Edward's best friend, but he never knew he would feel the way he did about Jasper and Edward's year or so long relationship.

Jasper tried speaking, but his mouth opened and closed a few times before he quit.

"Will you tell your parents? Will you take him as your spouse? Give him a family?"

Jasper was finally nudged to speak—he had no doubts about never coming out to his father. "You know I can't tell my dad that. I can't tell him I'm bi and in love with a man. Do you remember when Riley told dad he was gay? Remember how long he was depressed and hurt? I can't do that to him. I just… can't." He shook his head nervously as his fingers combed his hair.

"Man… how can you be such a coward? You've been so stupid all this time, but I'd never taken you for a wimp. Hasn't your father married the maid's daughter against his family's wishes? Hadn't he fought for her and made his folks accept her, and treat her like she deserved as their in-law? How come you never learned anything from him? From his history?"

Jasper couldn't take it anymore. He felt so humiliated and low he could hardly pull air into his lungs. Suddenly, he felt like every chance of happiness in his life was taken away and that life was surely not worth living.

In an attempt to save the little dignity he still had, he checked his watch and decided it was time to go—time for Edward to arrive at the club for work.

He left feeling defeated and miserable.

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**AN**/ See what I meant? Tell me what you think! Next chapter will be up next Saturday. Hope to see you then!


	2. Chapter 2

**AN**/ Second chapter is up! And so am I at five in the morning! Still don't know why! Decided to post the chapter before starting my day (which will be Hell since I'm working the whole Saturday). Remember this is a short story, but this is not the last chapter yet.

Thanks soooo much for the reviews! It's funny how great it is to come home from a lousy day at work to find such great reviews to the story! You always put a huge grin on my face!

As usual, the story is pre-written, pre-read by my bestie Lisa-FanFicCrazy, and pre-betaed by dearest **sue273.**

**Chapter 2**

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**Two Years Later**

Sitting by his husband's still open grave, Edward cried with his little girl in his arms, thinking she was the one thing life hadn't taken from him yet.

He had adopted Bianca once he'd married Garrett.

_Bianca had been conceived through IVF, and had been born from a surrogate mother once Garrett thought he was getting too old to wait any longer to find a partner, and have a kid. _

_Garrett met Edward at Emmett's. _

_After a few months trying to catch Edward's attention at the club and receiving only polite nods and stern looks, Garrett finally had the guts to push a piece of paper into Edward's suit pocket with his phone number and the words, "Call me. Garrett"_

_Edward had waited over six months for Jasper to try and right his wrong—he never expected Jasper to give up so easily. He was so much in love with the brown-haired man who had bewitched him. He never thought he'd ever accept being with a man who was still hiding his sexuality, but he'd do anything to be with Jasper. _

_He knew his anger over Jasper taking Bella to the wedding was a stupid thing. Something his drinking had enhanced, leading to a rushed and unthought out break up. _

_It was done, and in his mind, Jasper was the one who needed to make the first move so they got back together. He was the one who had screwed up and needed to do something about it. But all Jasper did was hide even more, clam up and suffer his loss._

_He was told Jay wouldn't go out at night anymore, he would just drive to and from work. Edward was sick and tired of moping and waiting. He ended up convincing himself that Jasper didn't really love him and had just given up. _

_He decided to see what this Garrett guy was all about._

_Garrett owned an advertisement company and pretended to be looking for a new face for a campaign so he could meet Edward outside the club._

_During the meeting, Garrett came clean and was forward when saying he couldn't forget Edward since he'd seen him at Emmett's. _

_Edward had noticed Garrett had never left the club with any other men._

_After a few dates, they started a relationship. After five months together, Garrett invited Edward to move in with him and Bianca. _

_It took Edward almost a month to decide whether he'd do it or not. He ended up accepting Garrett's proposition, and marrying the man a few months later. _

_Edward had never been happier. Garrett was a light in the darkness his life had turned out to be. He'd never felt so loved and cherished. _

After an accident, Edward felt he didn't deserve to have the happiness he shared with Garrett, since once more, life was taking away a loved one.

Edward felt he'd lost Garrett because deep inside he still loved another. He was never unfaithful or disloyal to Garrett, though.

Garrett knew every thought, every detail and dark shades of the corners of Edward's mind.

He didn't care. All he wanted was the chance to love Edward, taking from him whatever he wanted to give.

Edward gave himself, body and soul. He was the best husband he thought he could be. He was the best father for his little girl, and Jasper's name was never mentioned in their house once they were married.

As he sat there after the ceremony, feeling completely abandoned, Edward held Bianca tightly and cried. He tried not to alarm Bianca, crying quietly; careful his sobs wouldn't be felt by the little girl.

Emmett and Rose came back for them once they saw Edward's car was still parked at the curb and Edward and Bianca were nowhere to be seen. They were unable to remove statue-like Edward from there. He wouldn't answer them, or even pay attention to their pleas, his face buried in his daughter's hair, sitting cross-legged on the grass by his husband's grave with their daughter sitting on his lap. All they got to do was take little Bianca from Edward and drive her to their home.

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"Hello," Jasper's voice was hoarse after being startled awake by the ringing of the phone. He had fallen asleep as he watched T.V. on the couch after arriving from work.

"Hey, Jay… Are you okay?" Rose asked sounding worried.

"I'm… I'm fine." Jasper replied yawning. "What's up, sis?"

"I need to tell you something, but… well, I need you to tell me what you'll do about it." Rose was cryptic, as usual.

"What's this about? Is this a joke?" he asked still stretching trying to be fully awake while talking to his pregnant sister.

"No joke… it's about Edward." Rose's voice was serious and tentative.

Something must have been really wrong. It'd been two years since anyone attempted talking about Edward around him. They knew what would come to them if they tried.

Jasper stood up and walked to the bathroom with the phone on his ear having decided to wash his face as he talked to his sister. He stopped in front of the mirror above the sink and analyzed his face as he waited for Rose to find the words to tell him whatever she wanted to say about Edward. He couldn't rush her, not when he really didn't want to know what other great gesture Edward had made for his husband. He was sick and tired of listening to people whispering things about the two men, afraid Jasper might hear them and snap. Jasper looked older. Older than he was supposed to be.

He was tired.

His life was nothing he had hoped for.

He had always wanted to have a home full of people, just like his parents. He had always wanted to be a father, to make his baby fall asleep in his arms, to wake up in the middle of the night to a sleepy face asking him to move to his bed because of the monster in the closet.

When he fell in love with a man, it all seemed to be impossible. But he'd learned it wasn't. He loved Edward and wanted it all with him. But at what cost? Could he go after Edward and completely disregard the feelings of his parents?

Impatient and irritated, Jasper rushed Rose."Rose… spill it… I need to go to bed soon." She had to make up her mind, he thought.

"Jay, Edward was in an accident." The piece of information was blurted out with no preparation whatsoever. Jasper's stomach swirled and he felt a bitter taste flooding his mouth. His limbs went sort of limp and he had to lower himself to the floor, feeling weak just at the thought he had lost Edward for good this time.

Jasper couldn't make himself speak, couldn't ask Rose what had happened. His body started trembling and he sighed nervously as he pulled his hair, closing his eyes in a silent prayer.

"Jasper, he's okay…kind of."

Jasper's despair turned into anger, making his voice sound like an attack of some sort. "Why the fuck are you calling me, then? Why should I care he was in an accident? He's alive, right? He'll be—"

"He lost his husband." Rose cut him off.

Jasper went silent again. His heart was pounding against his ribs, his breathing sped in a reaction he couldn't identify as relief for having no one in the way anymore, or desperation for imagining how Edward would be feeling right then.

Maybe he was feeling both.

"Jasper, I need you to do something for me," Rose said, sounding still unsure about what she'd ask.

"Anything," was Jasper's sorrowful answer.

"It's been two hours since we left the cemetery. I believe Edward is still there. He won't leave; we didn't want to make a scene but now we're worried. He wouldn't answer his phone so Emmett went back there but he refuses to leave. Emmett's there now, watching over him."

"What do you want me to do? Do you think he'll listen to me?" Jasper's voice broke, his heart hurting maybe more than when he left Edward's place for the last time. His love for Edward had never died. He blamed himself for leaving that apartment and not being the man Edward needed him to be, after going through so much in life.

"We just need someone who can shake him back to life again. If he's not happy to see you, maybe he'll be mad at you. We just need to get him out of there before the place closes with him still in there."

Jasper stood up pulling a jacket on, grabbing a blanket from his unmade bed and the car keys on his way to the door. "Is the little one with him?" he asked Rose, hurrying out the door.

"No, she's here with me. She's already asleep. Poor thing is happy she hasn't lost her Daddy Edward in the accident, too."

"Good girl… glass half full kinda girl," Jasper commented already warmed by the thought of the little one.

"Yeah… Just bring her daddy home, please."

After getting directions to where Garrett's grave was, Jasper sped up and arrived in no time. As he walked up through the gravestones, he found Emmett seated leaning on a lonesome tree, watching Edward from a distance.

"Jesus, Jasper… what are you doing here?" Emmett was startled at the sight of Jasper standing beside him.

Jasper crouched down to Emmett's level and cleared things up.

"Rosalie called me. She said he won't leave. Asked me to bring him home."

"And how the fuck do you plan to do that?" Emmett spat.

"I'm gonna tell him I still love him. If that doesn't bring him home with me, it'll at least piss him off and make him leave on his own. Isn't that what you guys want? Him to leave this place?"

"Genius… Be my guest." Emmett stood.

Jasper took in Edward's appearance as he approached him from his side—he had a broken arm, his face was covered in bruises, there were a couple of cuts covered by bandages, one on his forehead and another on his jaw.

As Jasper got closer, he noticed Edward looking at him with the corner of his eye.

He didn't move though.

Jasper decided to act according to his heart, throwing caution away. The love of his life was seated on the cold floor mourning, hurting, aching.

Screw caution.

Jasper covered Edward's back with his blanket, sitting behind him, his chest to Edward's back, encasing him in with his arms.

Edward relaxed against his body sighing, leaning his head back on Jasper's shoulder.

Jasper waited, holding Edward in his arms, reveling in the warmth of the man he loved more than anything in life.

When the sun was setting, Jasper moved a little to indicate he would start saying something, but Edward beat him to it.

"Take me home?" he asked.

"Yours or mine?" Jasper asked not really afraid of sounding cheap.

"Yours."

Jasper stood up, helping Edward up, too. He sent a look to where Emmett was and nodded to the man releasing him from his watch duty.

Jasper and Edward walked towards Jasper's car, where Jasper opened the passenger door so Edward could climb inside.

Rounding the car, he sat in the driver's seat and watched Edward for a few seconds. His love for him had never been as strong as now. His face showed no anger anymore. He looked wiser, calmer. He looked so sad, it was heart wrenching.

Edward was quiet all the way to Jasper's place. Jasper didn't push him to speak. He didn't know what to say either.

Arriving there, Edward walked straight to Jasper's bedroom, lying on Jasper's bed fully clothed, face on the pillow, eyes closed.

Jasper followed him sick with worry. Suddenly, it felt like the past two years never happened.

He had to remind himself constantly—that the Edward on his bed was not his; he couldn't claim him for himself. He had no right to anymore.

Jasper knelt by the bed, close to Edward's face. He brushed a lock of hair away to look at his closed eyes as a tear escaped the corner of the left one.

Jasper cupped Edward's cheek, caressing his skin with the pad of his thumb, wiping his tear away.

Edward turned his head a little, placing a kiss on Jasper's palm, and sighing, turned his head away.

Feeling his phone vibrating in his pants' pocket, he stood up and left Edward, turning the lights off once he was out of the room.

As he looked at the screen, he saw it was Rose calling. "Where have you taken him?" Rose sounded frantic.

"He's here in my place," Jasper replied patiently.

"I told you to bring him home! Not to take him there and fuck him!" Rose shouted in his ear.

"Rose, you know me better than that. I brought him here because he asked me to. I'm not a dirty scumbag and you know it." Jasper was starting to lose his calm. Why did everyone expect the worst of him?

"He asked you to? I knew it…" she sounded defeated.

"What, Rose?"

"Never mind. If he asks, tell him Bianca is with us and that he can take his time. Oh, and his meds are in his pocket. I'm gonna email you the prescriptions. Just… just be good to him, okay?"

Jasper nodded and sighed, forgetting he was on the phone and Rose couldn't see him.

"Do you hear me, Jay? Be good to him!" she pressed.

"I heard you… How could I not be good to him, Rose? God…" Jasper let out a sigh, rolling his eyes. No one would ever forgive him for what he had done to Edward, for not being man enough to come out to his family and hurting Edward as he did.

Once he got back to the room, Edward seemed to be asleep. He took a look at him, noticing his pants were dirty from sitting on the grass. He turned around to look at his own pants and they were the same.

Jasper grabbed two pairs of sweat pants and two T-shirts, and went to the bathroom to change. As he came out, he debated whether to wake Edward up to change, let him sleep in those dirty funeral clothes, or change him while he was asleep as he had done so many times before.

The feelings those memories brought him were so overpowering he knelt on the bed and started taking Edward's shoes off, then his socks. He straddled Edward's thighs, slipping his hands under his hips to try and unbuckle Edward's belt. He was careful, trying not to startle Edward. He managed to get his belt off, unbuttoning his pants and pulling them down.

For a few seconds, he noticed Edward was wearing boxers—he had never worn boxers while with him.

As the pants were off, he slipped the sweatpants up Edward's legs.

Edward stirred and looked at him confused.

"Those pants were dirty and uncomfortable," Jasper commented.

Edward looked down, sat straight on the bed and just said, "Thanks."

"Wanna change into a T-shirt, too?" Jasper inquired showing him the tee he had in his hands.

Edward looked up at Jasper's hands, and then at the T-shirt Jasper was wearing as he took his jacket off.

He nodded.

As he unbuttoned his own shirt and got rid of his tie, he asked, "Why do you still have that T-shirt you're wearing?"

Jasper looked down and realized he was using one of Edward's Tees—he'd never got rid of Edward's things. Wearing his T-shirts was something natural to him.

"Sorry… I… I should have…" Jasper tried to speak but then Edward was shirtless across from him— his torso all bruised and scraped from the accident; there was a huge seatbelt black stripe across his chest. Jasper felt a lump in his throat almost preventing him from breathing.

"It's okay…" Edward said stretching his good arm so Jasper could pass him the T-shirt. Jasper seemed to be paralyzed by the image of Edward's wounds. Edward repeated, "It's okay, really."

"What is? What's okay?" Jasper snapped from his trance not really sure of what they were talking about anymore.

"Everything. Everything is okay. You wearing my shirt—"

"No. Can I get closer?" Jasper cut Edward off.

Edward nodded saying, "Sure."

Jasper sat by Edward and touched lightly every bruise, cut and scrape on Edward's face, chest and abs.

"Can you…" Edward started, "Can you take yours off, too?" tugging on the hem of Jasper's T-shirt.

Jasper was caught by surprise at Edward's request. He looked into Ed's green orbs as he slid his shirt up and off slowly, giving Edward time to regret his decision and stop him at any second.

As they were both shirtless, Edward moved and held Jasper slightly, but pressing his lips against Jay's neck.

Jay went with the flow, holding Edward as he held him, kissing him lightly as he was being kissed.

"Would you lay behind me… help me fall asleep?" Edward asked pulling away a little so as to look at Jasper's eyes.

Jasper nodded. Both moved on the bed, taking positions as agreed.

Jasper didn't know where he could touch Edward without hurting him—his back was a bit bruised, too. Edward didn't wait long to snuggle against Jasper's chest, pulling his arm around him, holding his hand below his waist. Jasper understood that anywhere else his hand landed would hurt him.

Edward's scent in his nostrils, his warmth against his body, his hand holding Jasper's—it was all Jasper asked for in two years. That and the guts to come out to his parents and having a shot with Edward again.

"How was it? Do you wanna talk?" he whispered noticing Edward hadn't fallen asleep yet after a few minutes. Maybe talking would help.

"I really don't know." Edward sighed. "We were coming back from a benefit; we had called for a driver 'cause we knew we would drink. The event was outside of town and we were really tired on our way back. I ended up falling asleep, and I didn't notice Garrett had unplugged his seatbelt so he could lie on my lap. We were both asleep when it happened. I was told we were hit by a speeding car. I was sitting behind the passenger seat while Garrett was behind the driver's seat where the car was hit." Edward sighed again and went on. "They were both killed instantly. I only woke up in the hospital to the news."

Jasper could notice how shaky Edward's voice was, but he didn't interrupt him.

"Jasper…"

"Yeah…"

"Do you still love me?" Edward murmured.

"I never stopped," Jasper answered honestly, emotion taking over him, tears forming in his eyes. "Do you still love me?" That was the most dreaded question Jasper was afraid to ask, but had to.

Edward only nodded, adding, "I wish you had fought for me."

Jasper's heart constricted painfully. He wished the same thing.

"Garrett… he left me a letter in the safe. He left a letter to everyone he loved in his safe. In mine, he wrote I should fight for you and be happy to have you anyway I could. He said… he said I should take whatever you have to offer me, the same as he did with me. He said that even knowing I still loved you, I made him really happy for choosing to be with him."

Jasper felt the warmth of his own tears sliding down his cheeks. He understood that if Edward was in his arms now, it was a last act of love from Garrett—freeing Edward and encouraging him to be with whom he truly loved once Garrett wasn't there to love Edward anymore.

Emmett was right—Garrett was the best thing that ever happened in Edward's life.

Jasper heard Edward's breathing evening out.

He stayed there for a few minutes, drawing from Edward the courage he needed to do what he had just decided to.

* * *

Jasper walked into his parents' place, shaking like a leaf. He knew he had to be honest and that he couldn't stay away from Edward anymore—he truly didn't want to.

Jasper left his car in the garage, walking up to the house and entering by the back door.

He met his mom in the kitchen, holding her tight as soon as he reached her. "Son, is something wrong?" Maggie asked as she noticed Jasper's demeanor.

"Everything is okay, mom. Is dad in the den?" Jasper pulled away from his mother, shoving his hands down his pants' pockets as he walked towards the door that led to the social area of the house.

"No, I think he's in the living room," Maggie replied, turning to the sink to wash some dishes.

"Mom, actually I need to talk to you both... together." Jasper shot his mom a look, hopeful she would understand that he was serious.

Maggie dried her hands and followed her son silently.

Jasper walked into the living room where he met his dad, who stood up to greet him. His dad held him tightly and he returned the hug hoping that wouldn't be the last one his dad gave him, still proud of the son he thought he was.

As they let go, both parents sat on the couch looking at Jasper as if expecting him to do the same. He just couldn't. He couldn't stop pacing back and forth, nervousness pouring from him as he stroked his hair and sighed, looking at them. Closing his eyes, he remembered Edward at his place, lying on his bed, so broken and battered. He couldn't make him suffer even more. He couldn't ask him to just accept what he wanted to give him, what he thought he could.

Finding a bit of courage deep inside himself, he started, "Mom, Dad… I need to talk to you." Taking a deep breath, he went on, "I need you to know something about myself I've been hiding since… since I've known it."

Jasper had a hand on his waist, another pulling on his hair. His breathing had sped up and he was trying to even it out to calm himself down in order to soften the blow, but it was almost an impossible goal to achieve. Pulling a huge puff of air, he closed his eyes and started again. "I'm in love with someone… I've been in love for over three years now…" He was almost there. "Fuck…" he mouthed as he turned away from his parents.

Both were looking at him with curious eyes and a frown on their foreheads.

Jasper turned back and started again. "I'm in love with this person who has just lost a spouse… I need to tell you because I just… I can't lose him again."

At the mention of the word _him_, Jasper thought his parents would have gotten it. Apparently, they hadn't gotten the picture yet, since they were both still looking at him unaffected by his words. He thought that perhaps he'd been too subtle. Staring at his father now, hoping not to cause too much damage, Jasper spoke clearly this time, "Dad, I'm in love with a man."

His father sighed and looked at his wife, who held his hand tightly before looking at Jasper and asking, "Is he Emmett's friend, Edward Mason?" Maggie's look of concern was clear.

Jasper was flabbergasted—how did she know?

"Yeah, mom. How did you know?" As soon as he finished his question to her, he looked back at his dad who showed concern, too, but not the sad look he remembered when his younger brother came out.

"You mentioned he had lost a spouse. Emmett and Rose were here when someone called them from the hospital." Jasper only nodded his acknowledgement.

"Son, how do you think this'll go? I mean, he just lost the man he loves." His parents were worried but showed no signs of shock.

"I don't think you understand what I'm here to tell you. I'm in love with a man. I'm…" Jasper huffed before finally saying the word, "… gay." Since he received no response to his words again, he asked, "Aren't you guys shocked?"

His father shifted on his seat a bit, slid to the edge of the couch supporting his elbows on his knees as he calmly answered, "I'm a little bit, yeah. I have to say I've never imagined you would be one, too… you know. Your mom once thought it was a possibility." Alistair turned to glance at Maggie receiving her confirmation as she nodded. "But we dismissed the idea, thinking we were too used to being around Riley and imagining things just because you wouldn't start dating again after things went downhill with Bella."

"Aren't you mad at me?" Jasper asked feeling a bit insulted, thinking his parents just didn't care.

"Mad? Why would we be mad?" Maggie asked confused. "We get it, you're gay. So what? What worries me is that you're pining after a man who's just lost his husband and maybe isn't ready to love you back."

Jasper walked around, his heart a turmoil of feelings he didn't know how to deal with. "I… I had him, you know. I had him but couldn't make myself tell you two!" Jasper paced around the room trying to understand what was going on with his parents. "I had him for almost two years and… and I lost him because I couldn't feel comfortable with him in public afraid I would end up killing dad…"

"Why would you kill me, son? Why would you think something like that?" His father's creased brows showed more than just confusion.

"Dad… when Riley came out to you, you were depressed for years. I just couldn't be the one to add to that."

"Jasper, it's a totally different situation, son." Alistair motioned his hand asking Jasper to come closer. Once he did, he pulled Jasper by the hand to sit across from him at the coffee table. His dad held his hand firmly before releasing it and explaining. "Riley has always been a handful. He was always getting into fights, drinking, looking for every kind of trouble to get into. Him being gay only added to the list of concerns that was already too long at that time. We worried he would get bashed, or even worse, get sick or something. We know all that's possible being straight, too, but we also know men are hornier and the risk is higher. Your brother never cared for his health or wellbeing before. Why would he wear a condom, why would he be careful to choose the right guy, why would he choose one when he could have so many being as good-looking as he is? When he was into girls, we knew he wore protection because he was scared to death of being a father so young. With men, we knew things are different—faster, more urgent."

Jasper looked down blushing at his father's comment. He knew that to be true. Sex with Edward was far more pleasurable, intense and frequent than with any girl he'd dated.

Sighing, his father continued, "I'm proud of you, son. It takes a lot of courage to admit to yourself you love a man, even more to admit it to your parents. I'm just sorry you thought you'd hurt us so badly by being honest with us."

Alistair pulled Jasper by the hand and held him close. Jasper felt so relieved he could hardly believe it. His mom joined the hug and Jasper felt a huge weight being lifted from his shoulders.

As they let go, Jasper excused himself, saying, "Edward is at my place… I need to go back to him."

"What do you mean in your place?" Maggie inquired.

"He wouldn't leave after the funeral. Rose called me… He still loves me, mom. He had just quit waiting for me to come to terms with my own feelings and issues, so he tried being happy with someone else. And he was… we never stopped loving each other, though. I can't just leave him hurting alone like that. Even if he decides he doesn't want me anymore, I want to do things right from now on. I've hurt him too much by trying to hide who I was. Now, he just has to say the words and I'm his. And I'm ready to give him whatever he wants, be for him the man he needs."

"It won't be easy, you know?" Maggie commented.

"Nothing worth fighting for is easy, Mom." His mother held him tight once more.

Jasper thanked his parents for their support and left.

* * *

Jasper arrived home and found Edward still asleep.

He changed into the clothes he had on before leaving and lay down, pulling Edward to his arms. It didn't matter how long it would take to have him back completely. He would wait.

Jasper's eyes were getting heavy, sleep claiming him, when he felt Edward turn in his arms.

Pulling Jasper into him, Edward's arms snaked around Jasper's naked back, kneading and stroking. Edward's lips brushed the skin of his neck, his fingers entangling with his hair.

"Jasper, I love you," Edward whispered between nips and kisses on Jasper's heated skin. "But I need time."

Jasper expected that. "Take all the time you need."

In a matter of minutes, Jasper felt Edward's breathing evening out, its rhythm lulling Jasper to sleep.

The next morning, Jasper woke up to an empty bed. A sharp pain took over his heart, but he reined in those heartbreaking feelings, remembering Edward couldn't be his, yet.

* * *

**AN/ Why would he leave without saying goodbye? I wish Jasper had told Edward he was out… What do you guys think? Next update is Saturday!**


	3. Chapter 3

**AN**/ Third chapter is up, now!

Remember this was a short story? Well… we are close to the end, now. I wonder if these two will ever find a way to move on together…*sighs*

Again, thanks a lot for the reviews! It's wonderful to know what you think !

I know these two are a pickle…

As usual, the story is pre-written, pre-read by my bestie Lisa-FanFicCrazy, and pre-betaed by dearest **sue273.**

**Maryhell! LOVE U! Miss you loads! Sending you Be Mine today! I need a kick on the butt to go on writing it!**

* * *

**Chapter 3**

When Jasper heard Rosalie and Emmett walking through the front door, Jasper's skin broke into goose bumps.

They were at their parents' place for Thanksgiving dinner and, even loving his parents as he did, he thought twice before accepting his parents' invitation, for the fear of meeting a very pregnant Rosalie and his not-so-loving brother-in-law Emmett.

They were both "Team Edward" and he was not willing to hear a single word about the man. He hadn't heard from him for months now, after spending that night together and admitting they still loved each other.

The man simply vanished.

Jasper knew he needed time, he understood that. He never understood, though, why he couldn't even say goodbye, or send him a text, or even make a phone call to say something, anything to him.

The one time he met Edward, Edward not only pretended he didn't see him, but when approached was ice-cold and indifferent about Jasper's presence at his side.

'Asshole', he thought.

His hope was crashed and burnt.

He just wished he could forget about him, forget the love he had for him, forget how great things were when they were together.

His parents' Thanksgiving dinner was a big event. They invited the whole family, friends from the neighborhood and work. Maggie loved to have the house full of people and this opportunity was perfect.

Jasper never understood why they couldn't have a nice family dinner. He hated to be around people he hardly knew.

Jasper was sort of hiding from the crowd in the kitchen, praying no one would find him and torture him with questions about the stock market as they used to do. Why so many people liked to take advantage of his knowledge, believing that was what friends were for, was beyond his understanding. That was his job, not something he did just for the hell of it.

As he played with some peanuts that had fallen to the table when Maggie was arranging a bowl of appetizers, he heard Rose's rushed steps towards the kitchen—her heels clacking on the wooden floor were borderline maddening. His stomach churned at the thought of having to face her so soon that day.

Rose walked in, and looking preoccupied, moved her head to show her brother she wanted him to follow her.

Jasper—probably looking as miserable as he felt—rolled his eyes and huffed, but stood up and followed his sister.

They walked through the crowd, Jasper enduring all the greetings from the boring people he had been hiding from in the kitchen, moving to the stairs that led to the bedrooms and private area.

Jasper followed Rose into their parents' bedroom and saw Rose closing the door behind him before moving towards their parents' bed and sitting on the edge.

"Hey, Bro, spill it," she simply said.

Jasper had been feeling hollow, useless, lonely. Apparently, it was written all over his face. Rose must have noticed it and was playing the Momma Bear once more.

He was having contradictory feelings towards Edward. At the same time, he missed him like crazy, he wanted to choke the man to death for not only leaving him, but doing so after filling him with hope they'd be together.

Being at his parent's house watching Riley and his boyfriend, Seth, being all lovey-dovey with each other didn't help him any, either.

His father was bursting with happiness since his brother had settled down with the native-American kid. They were both going to university and living in the dorms, but coming back to Alistair and Maggie's every weekend.

Their joy made Jasper feel sick.

He was infuriated watching his family acting so naturally around the two; no objections, no hard feelings. That could have been him and Edward for years together.

The realization that he'd lost Edward for nothing pissed him off so bad it made him want to puke, all for the mere fear of hurting his parent's feelings. His father even told him once he was hurt because Jasper's actions showed he hadn't trusted his parents' love for him.

Jasper just misread the whole Riley situation, made 'too much ado about nothing' as his mother had said, and lost the love of his life.

If that wasn't enough to bear, now he had his sister giving him shit for something he couldn't care less about. 'What was is it she was saying?' he thought.

"Jasper! Are you listening to me?"

Jasper snapped out of his musings and tried paying attention to the fuming blond woman across from him.

"What?"

"I asked you what happened the night Ed slept with you."

"That's none of your fucking business!" Jasper barked.

"Not my business? Then why has he become a fucking asshole all over again? Why do I have to endure his crankiness at work every fucking day and the thing that pissed him off mostly from all the shit that's happening was me asking him how that night was?"

"'Cause that's fucking private!" Jasper yelled, exasperated. Walking around the room, feeling like a trapped animal, he wanted to be out of that situation so bad, he shoved his fingers painfully in his hair, pulling the strands back.

"I need to know, Jay," she pressed.

"I don't see how telling you what happened between us, in the privacy of my own home, could make any difference for you and your co-workers." Jasper reined in his anger, feeling tired. He was exhausted from thinking about that night so many times. He looked for what in the world he had done wrong to make Edward so mad at him. He couldn't find anything, anything that could be reason for him leaving and never contacting him, then acting the way he did when they met again.

"Maybe I can help? I don't know… I'm just tired of watching you shrink into this anti-social castaway, hiding from everybody, sulking in the corner all the time! You handled him being married to Garrett way better than this."

"I thought you were worried about Edward… Anyway, when he was with Garrett, it was because I was stupid and hadn't fought for him. I felt sorry for myself for being so weak. I also didn't want to be that, you know… I didn't want to be gay. It was more than just losing Edward; it was hard accepting who I was, having to endure people looking at me differently, treating me as if I were sick or perverted."

"Now he's not with me because he simply doesn't want to be. I threw all my awkwardness and fears to Hell so I could make him happy! I came out to Mom and Dad, I admitted to myself I love a man and I almost feel comfortable being a homosexual, although I'd never even looked at another guy as I look at Edward. I've never felt attracted to anyone else since him."

Jasper walked some more, trying to pull some more air into his lungs, calming down the turmoil inside of him. He loved Edward so freaking much, but right then he hated him with the same intensity.

"I feel like a fucking moron! I don't know who I am anymore. I don't know what to do with my life! Before Edward, I was always surrounded by friends. I played my guitar in Joe's band and at James's cafe. I used to have a life, you know… When I fell for Edward, he became my whole life; I started to play my guitar just for him. No one mattered anymore, nothing mattered when he was with me. I just quit everything to be with him. I hate him, Rose! I had never felt anything for men before him. I changed because of him. Now, he won't give me the time of day. "

Rose bit her lips and grimaced at Jasper's reasoning.

"I have tried to pinpoint what I've done wrong that night, Rose. I just can't find anything that could have made him so mad at me. I've tried calling him, but he just shuts his phone when I do. He won't even talk to me, Rose. I don't think he knows I came out."

Jasper ended up sitting next to Rose, looking for some comfort in the arms of his bursting-pregnant sister.

"Maybe I can help. Why don't you try me?"

Jasper ended up telling her the whole story and she couldn't point out any mistakes in Jasper's actions either.

"The worst of all, Sis, is to have heard him say he loved me, just to discard me as trash the very next day."

Rose sighed and seemed lost in thought.

* * *

Knocking at the office door before opening a crack and sneaking her head in, Rose tried to call the tall-framed man's attention without alarming him, "Hey, Ed… Are you okay?"

Rosalie was careful, trying not to wake up the cranky beast inside Edward.

Rose was worried. After Garrett's passing, Edward became defensive and short-tempered. He resembled the asshole Edward Rose had met when she started dating Emmett.

"What, Rose? What now?" were his harsh words, throwing the papers he had in his hand to his desk with so much strength they just skidded there and flew to the floor.

Apparently, no caution would have kept his nerves at bay.

"Is this a bad time?" she asked, trying to keep her own irritation at bay—Edward was her boss but she'd never accept that kind of treatment from anyone. She refrained from rasping back, taking in consideration all Edward had been through those past four months.

"Sorry, Rose, come in. I just need these fuckers gone! I won't work for these criminals anymore! No matter how much money they pay us!"

Edward was flushed with fury, his body trembling as he supported himself on the desk, letting his head fall between his shoulders.

Rose was the head of Garrett's agency creative department—she was the one who took Garrett to Emmett's the night he saw Edward for the first time.

Once Edward and Garrett got married, Edward came to work at the agency, learning everything there was to know about the business. He became Garrett's assistant and soon the person Garrett went to when he needed to make a difficult decision.

Garrett had left Edward as his successor in the agency, saying he was the one person he would ever trust their daughter's inheritance with.

Edward was prepared for the job; Rose had no doubt about that. What worried Rose was that was the only thing he'd been doing since he'd lost his husband. Bianca had a nanny who would stay till late at night, when Edward finally managed to get home. Rose knew he didn't have to work so late every night.

Rose knew how hard it was for Edward to go home and not finding Garrett there. He loved his little girl, but he'd confessed he wished he could move out of that place. He didn't do it because of Bianca, who loved it and co-owned the place. He couldn't even sell it anyway.

"It's your firm, Ed. Cut them loose," she said, letting herself into the CEO's office. "Tell them you won't work for them anymore. We have enough clients."

Edward looked up, his eyes red, but not really from wrath. 'Had he been crying?' Rose thought.

"You think Gar would have done that?" He ended pressing his lips together in a thin line waiting for Rose's answer.

"I think he wouldn't have taken that account in the first place," she answered matter-of-factly.

Edward nodded. "But that's not what you came here to talk about, am I right?" He waited for her confirmation still looking through his lashes with pursed lips.

"No. Actually, I came here to ask you if Bianca can come stay with us this weekend."

"Again?" He straightened up to his full height, pacing around the desk, shoving his fingers through his hair.

Rose could swear she saw a tear sliding down his cheek, but he hid it well.

"Edward, what's going on with you? Do you need help with anything? Is there something we can do?" she offered sincerely—Edward's hard expressions turned soft once his eyes met hers.

He rounded the table and sat on his chair, burying his face in his hands and letting out a long sigh.

Rose walked to the chair across from Edward's desk, then took a seat.

"You know you can talk to me, right? I like to think I'm more than your employee here, Ed." She reached for his arm, trying to reassure him of their friendship.

Edward slid his hand to cover hers, as he slumped on top of his desk in a defeated move.

"Talk to me, Ed," she reinforced.

"Rose… I thought time would heal all wounds. Isn't that what everybody says?"

As Rose saw Edward's eyes on her, she just nodded. Since he wouldn't continue, Rose pressed, "What wounds haven't healed yet? Losing Gar?"

Edward grimaced, seeming uncomfortable with what he had to say. Pursing his lips once more, he shook his head no.

"Jasper?" Rose enquired.

Edward didn't really answer, but started, "I slept at his place the night of Gar's funeral."

"I know."

"When I woke up and realized where I was I wanted to die right there. How could I? How could I turn to the one person who hurt me so much for help? Someone who had always been between me and my husband even if it were just in my mind? I'm so fucking ashamed of myself, you have no idea!"

Rose kept quiet. She knew all about that night.

Edward stood up, punishing his copper threads of hair, as he continued, "It all came back, you know… The hurt, all those times I had to pretend to be his friend, all those times I tried holding his hand and he batted mine with a frown on his face. His excuses for not coming out; he was a grown man, for Christ's sake!"

"Edward, you knew what you were getting yourself into once you invested in a relationship with a straight man."

Edward had his back to her, so he turned slightly to look at her from the corner of his eye.

"Don't say you didn't know. I know you did. I remember the first time you saw Jasper and Bella at Emmett's. It was the very first time I ever saw you smile. Your eyes were wide and you told me it didn't matter he had a girlfriend. You said he'd be yours someday."

Edward huffed, but nodded.

"I remember every drunken word from you about him since that day—how you knew he liked you, too, how your skin tingled every time he touched you, which was a lot more often than men actually touched, you said. I remember the first time you two danced and you had your hands all over a drunk-as-fuck Jasper; the first time you took his shirt off on the dance floor and practically humped him while dancing in front of everyone, pretending Jasper was not straight and forgetting the fact that he was still committed to a woman."

Rose expected an answer that never came. So she went on, "You seduced him, Edward. I won't say he was fine before you. I won't say he was a hundred percent straight. But he had a life he was okay living, and you swept him away from it. You captivated him… I remember the first time you kissed him on the dance floor… You made him fall in love with you. I remember you taking him outside to the alley after he broke up with Bella."

Edward's head hung low between his shoulders, his breathing speeding up. "Rose, I loved him from the first smile he ever gave me. I just… I had to have him," Edward revealed, turning towards Rosalie, but passing by her to stop at the other end of the office in front of the windows.

"I knew he was into me, too. I saw it in his eyes… I felt it in his body every time he came to give me the awkward one-armed hug goodbye."

"He still loves you, you know. He never moved on from you." Rose pursed her lips and narrowed her eyes trying to defend herself from any harsh responses she'd receive after poking the lion with such a short stick.

"Well… he shouldn't. I just can't do it, Rose… I've got a daughter who deserves better than what he has to offer."

"I don't know what you mean," Rose commented confused.

"I never told you this, but…Garrett left a letter to each person who would be involved in Bianca's life, who would watch her grow up." Edward pulled a huge puff of air before closing his eyes and continuing, "…that was the first place he wrote he wanted me to run the agency in his absence. Well, there he said I should…" Edward pursed his lips as he bowed his head looking at his hands for a second, "I should try and get back together with Jasper."

Rose was flabbergasted. She never knew Garrett was aware of Edward's feelings for Jasper, although she always knew he still loved her brother.

At the blonde's silence, Edward went on, "He said… he said I should accept whatever Jasper had to offer, no matter what the obstacles were, that I should fight for whom I loved the way he fought for me." Edward looked away, as if ashamed of his feelings and actions in the past.

"He knew it, then?" Rose asked, creasing her brow at the idea.

Edward nodded, leaving his head low. "He's always known, Rose. He knew it and he wanted me anyway. He loved me with all his heart and I tried being to him the man, the husband he deserved. I loved him, Rose. I did. In a way, I still do. He's my baby's father, he's the one who made me feel unconditionally loved and cared for. He was kind and respectful, and was also an incredible father and boss. I never knew how to repay him for being so good to me, for loving me that much. I did what I could. I hope it was enough." Tears fell down his face.

"It was, Ed, I bet it was. We could all see how wonderful you were to him."

Playing with his fingers, Edward pressed his lips together before speaking. "He was the best. The best friend, the best husband, the most generous father, the best lover… I owe him everything I am now." Edward's voice cracked at the end.

"What about what he told you to do… about Jasper?"

Edward's nervousness poured again; his face sporting a scowl as he got rid of his suit jacket. Loosening his tie, sweat broke out on his skin in a heat not even the air con could prevent.

"I can't… I can't go back to the closet I've been out of for so long. I can't accept being hidden from my family and friends. I can't expose my daughter to a situation like that. Garrett must have written that letter before I adopted her. I didn't care to check the date. I know for a fact he wouldn't want his daughter to be someone's secret."

Rosalie couldn't argue with the man. He was right. Bianca deserved a parent who could give her all the love and care Edward did. She had lost the only biological parent she had.

Rose knew Jasper was out for her parents, but she wasn't sure he was out for his friends or willing to be. She couldn't raise false hope in Edward's heart by telling him the little she knew about the subject, but she was mortified she couldn't help her friend and her brother out of this mess their love life seemed to be.

Maybe they weren't really meant to be together.

Edward walked to his desk, leaning to sit on the edge, holding the desk board on both his sides.

"How is he, Rose?"

Rose took a look at Edward and decided he didn't look any better than Jay. He'd lost weight, his skin was pale, eyes lifeless, with dark rings framing them.

"Hummm… what do you want me to tell you? What you want to hear or the truth?" The blonde woman looked up at Edward, brows shot up, waiting for an answer that never came.

"I gotta tell you, I'm not into gossip. I hate talking about one to another. I don't think you wish to hear what I would have to say as response to your question," Rose retorted.

"Just tell me, please." Edward seemed calmer, but Rose didn't want to be fooled.

"Look, Edward, I don't wanna meddle. I did it once, when I asked Jasper to go try and bring you home after Garrett's… damn. You made a poor decision then, and it still pisses you off. I'm not gonna be the one to put you two in contact all over again so you could slip and make a poor choice again, making you hate yourself even more."

"Life is hard enough with you being a pain in the ass as you are now. We don't need any more aggravation to add up to that."

With that she stood up and left, waving her hand goodbye to Edward in an attempt to escape from more questions about Jasper. She thought that it was best that she didn't play cupid with those two. They needed to find their way back to each other themselves.

Edward frowned at Rose's comment, but decided to let it go for now.

'I thought men were more intelligent than that,' she wondered.

* * *

**AN/** Oh man... I know. Rose is the only one who could help and she wouldn't do it! I get her, though. This is a beehive! Two angry men, desperately in love with each other, many reasons why they can hate each other for life... Tell me what you think! Love your thoughts!


	4. Chapter 4

**AN**/ Last chap people! Sorry for posting on Sunday instead of Saturday. Fanfiction . net wouldn't allow me to post last night... :(

Let's see if these two will finally find their way back to each other on their own as Rose thought it should be.

They are tiresome…*sighs*

I loved the reviews for last chapter, especially those where you guys told me you thought Edward was also to blame they weren't together yet! Felt like … never mind! lol

Thanks sooooooooo much for reading this story! I'd never thought you'd like it so much!

The story was pre-read by my bestie **Lisa-FanFicCrazy**, and betaed by dearest **sue273, and NO! I don't own the characters! Only wrote what they told me to!**

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**Chapter 4**

Holding Rose's little girl in his arms, Jasper was startled by the image from across the room—Edward and Bianca were coming in—something Rose knew he wasn't expecting.

Jasper moved closer to where Rose was resting. It was Christmas Eve and the whole family was together for Christmas supper—a Brazilian tradition their mother kept to remember the family and friends she'd left in that country before coming to look for a better life in America.

This year, they decided it would take place at Rose and Emmett's, since Rose had just had a C-section the week before and needed to be comfortable in her own home those days.

The family would all be sleeping at their place so they could open presents the next morning.

Jasper had little Sophie in his arms from the time he came in, and whenever someone took her from him, it wasn't long till he offered to take her back again. Now he looked thankful he had her as a shield from all the pain of watching Edward and Bianca walking through the door.

"What's Edward doing here?" he whispered, turning his back to the man to look at Rose with eyes wide as saucers, his cheeks flushed.

"I'm sorry, bro. Had I told you he was coming you wouldn't have come, too. I wanted you here, so I just…" Rose felt shitty for concealing the information, but she had a gut feeling this was something good—them meeting.

"Garrett's family went to London for Christmas. Edward and Bianca were going, too, but they lost their flight because Bianca had a fever and said she didn't wanna go. She asked him to come here for Christmas supper. She saw us planning it a few days ago, when she was here for the day."

Rose's face was apologetic. She noticed Jasper's nerves were giving him a hard time. He looked like he was ready to flee from the room and disappear.

Rose observed the scene as Edward turned and his eyes met Jasper's image. His jaw dropped as he watched Bianca running towards his ex-lover, shouting, "Uncle Jasper! Uncle Jasper! Lemme see her!"

Jasper lowered himself to his knees to receive the hug Bianca always gave him when she saw him, and show her the baby in his arms.

During the last month of Rose's pregnancy, Jasper had practically moved in with her and Emmett, so as to keep her company at night when Em was at work. She was too heavy, her movements were slower and she needed a lot of help around the house. Jasper was an excellent cook and tried to keep her well fed and comfortable through the last weeks before Sophie was born.

Needless to say Bianca, who spent a lot of time at Rose's, was more than happy to have another "uncle", since she called Rose her Momma Bear—the same nickname Emmett had been calling Rose since she'd gotten pregnant.

Jasper had confessed to Rose it was weird how much he liked the girl. She was always all over Jasper whenever she visited, batting her lashes at him whenever she wanted something. Jasper could never say no to the little one, who was always very excited to be around "Uncle Jay".

Rose remembered how Bianca had told her once she wanted to marry Jasper when she grew up. Rose saw her face fall when Rose asked her if Jasper wasn't too old for her, and had to inform her Jasper liked boys in an attempt to put an end to her fantasy.

It didn't take long for her face to brighten up as she blurted, "Maybe Uncle Jay can marry my dad! He can be my new daddy, then! We'd be family for real." Wrapping her skinny arms around Rose's neck, she bounced up and down on Rose's bed, giggling excitedly.

Now, Rose could see the calm and warm expression in Edward's face as he watched Jasper on his knees, Bianca's arm around his neck and leaning her head on Jasper's shoulder to look at the baby. Rose didn't know if Edward could hear the quiet exchange of words between Jasper and Bianca.

"I missed you, Uncle Jay."

"I've missed you, too, munchkin," Jasper replied, emotion rolling off his tongue.

"All I wanted for Christmas was to spend it with my family," the little girl commented.

"I'm sorry you missed your plane, sweetheart." Jasper sounded genuinely sincere with her.

"Don't be. I didn't want to go to London; this is where I wanted to be. I'm with my family now. I love you and Momma and Papa bear. Grandma Maggie is the best Granny a girl could ask for. Sophie is lucky." Bianca had lowered her voice at the end, showing some sort of sadness.

"Baby, you are her granddaughter, too." Rose spoke trying to comfort the girl.

"I know. She told me that in her heart I was her granddaughter. I wanted it to be real, though." Bianca pouted, her face so sad Rose's heart shrank a little bit.

Jasper surprisingly came to Rose's rescue. He moved to look Bianca straight in the eye. "You know that our friends are the family we choose. We chose you as you chose us, and that makes our connection even more special than blood."

It was something Rose never expected—Jasper including himself in the little girl's life as family even resenting her dad so much, feeling abandoned, humiliated, chewed and spat out by him, as he had told Rose himself.

Bianca snuggled closer into Jasper's neck, saying, "I didn't wanna be just your niece. I wanted to be your daughter."

Rose couldn't imagine what Jasper must have felt when he heard Edward's daughter saying such a thing to him, but she saw him sniffing and wiping a tear that escaped his eye right before Bianca disentangled herself from him and coming to Rose for a hug.

The evening rolled on and Rose couldn't make herself look away from Jasper and Edward. Her heart wished for them to at least speak to each other, but they stayed as far away from each other as they could—Jasper not even glancing at Edward's direction, Edward staring at Jasper from a distance non-stop.

As Rose moved to the kitchen to organize everything for dessert, she met Edward and Emmett speaking. Edward still kept his eyes on Jasper who was just out of the door, sitting on the comfortable, fluffy carpet on the living room floor. He was cross-legged with Sophie in his left arm sleeping as he played a board game with Bianca, Riley and Seth.

As Rose walked in, the men shut up. Emmett moved to the dining room as he heard Alistair calling for the wine bottle he'd promised to take him.

As Rose moved around the kitchen, Edward softly asked, "Rose, why are your parents looking at me so much tonight?"

"What do you mean looking at you so much? I haven't noticed." She was sincere. She hadn't noticed anything unusual about her parents' behavior. Although her mom was really pleased to know Edward was coming for supper.

"I don't know. Whenever my eyes meet theirs, they are looking at me with a pleasant smile on their faces. It feels kind of creepy," Edward added.

Rose sighed. She felt it was pointless to keep it a secret, though she had promised Jasper she would never tell Edward.

"They have probably been acting weird because they think you and Jasper are on your way to getting back together. They are curious about you."

Edward furrowed his brows, looking positively confused and astonished. "What? They know about us?" he whisper-yelled pulling Rose to look him in the eye.

"Yeah… Jasper came out," she stated.

"When?" His voice trembled, his hand shaking as he gripped the counter on his side.

"Fuck. Shit! I need to stop swearing now that I've got a daughter."

"Rose, don't tease me," Edward warned her.

"Okay." Rose pursed her lips as she looked for the right words and the courage to betray her brother's trust, trying to convince herself she was doing the right thing. "He told our parents the night you slept at his place."

"What? That night? How?"

"He left you asleep and went to my parents. He saw you were hurting and you needed him to be who you always wanted him to be, so he could try and make you happy again."

Edward ran a hand through his hair, moving away from the counter. He seemed to be puzzled. "Why hasn't he told me that, then?" he asked glancing back at Rose.

"He was going to, but you left."

Rose saw Edward's face flushing, his teeth sinking in his bottom lip before he stated with no hesitation, "I love him, Rose."

"I know you do. You have to understand one thing, though. He's hurt. Actually, he's beyond hurt. He's feeling so damn low it's heartbreaking."

"He hasn't looked at me once since I arrived."

"Edward, he feels he isn't good enough for you. He seems to think Garrett was such a great husband to you that he doesn't measure up. In his mind that's what stopped you from wanting him."

Edward huffed. "Jesus, Rose. That's so far from the truth. I want him so bad I feel it in my bones. My heart swelled when I saw Bianca running towards him today. I never knew they were that close. I think I have to thank you for that."

"I had nothing to do with it. It was a matter of chance," Rose answered, wondering what he would feel if he knew Bianca had told Jasper she wanted to be his daughter earlier that evening.

"I want him back, Rose. Do you think he'd forgive me? Forgive me for being such a fool and making him feel so bad about himself?" His eyes were so full of hope. He went on before Rose could answer him. "Rose, Jasper was always honest about his feelings and fears. You were right, I wanted too much, too soon from him. His life turned upside down once he admitted to himself he wanted me, once he admitted he loved me, a man nonetheless." Edward moved to stop at a spot he could see Jasper better through the door. He was rocking Sophie softly, smiling at her pretty little face as she stirred in his arms.

"He never hid anything from me, though. I was a fool not giving him the time he needed to come to terms with the huge change in his life. What's a year in the life of someone who has just figured out they were gay? It took me years to accept I didn't like girls the way my friends from school did. I only had the guts to kiss a boy when I went to college. Even then I tried to fool myself saying it felt good only because it was forbidden." With a sigh, Edward's features hardened, his forehead frowning, his head bowing forward in concentration. "Jasper never lied to me like Garrett did."

Rose's head snapped up in surprise. "He lied to you?"

Edward nodded, one hand wiping his forehead, pulling some strands of hair back. "Remember I told you he left letters in his safe to everyone important in his life?" Edward glanced at Rose, receiving a nod from her in response. "Well, he had a really good reason for that."

Rose was puzzled. She stopped what she was doing to focus on what Edward was telling her.

"He was sick, Rose. He'd been sick since before we met. He had cancer. It wasn't very aggressive, but they had run out of ways to treat it so… he was pretty much sentenced to death."

Rose's heart sank. She never knew it. "How did you find that out? Was it before or after the accident?"

"After. I got a call from this doctor a few months after Garrett had passed. A doctor I never met. He said he was sorry for Garrett's passing and said I shouldn't worry about the last bills. It took me a long while to go looking for answers. But I finally did."

Rose moved towards Edward, pulling him into a hug. She felt so sorry for Edward her tears fell down her cheeks on their own accord. Edward held her back, tight.

"Everything good he's ever done for me just vanished at the thought I walked into a relationship with him, blinded by his lies. He made me love him, knowing I was doomed to watch him die a painful and slow death, powerless, unable to do a thing. I'm not saying I wouldn't have married him had I known I would have to go through that, but I needed to know, Rose. I needed to be able to choose."

"I know you did," Rose said releasing Edward from her hug.

"I'm so angry, I'm furious, really. I'll never know why he never told me. I'll never know what his plans were for when the disease took its natural course. What would he tell me then? That he had just found out he was sick? I wonder what else he lied about, you know. It makes me feel sick."

Rose pulled Edward close again. He looked broken and pissed off at the same time.

"You need to let this go. You need to forget about all that… hold on to the good things that came from it." Rose spoke against Edward's shirt, still embracing the man.

"I know. That's what I've been trying to do."

As if on cue, Jasper walked in with a very hungry, crying, little Sophie in his left arm, and Bianca hopping attached to Jasper's right hand.

"Daddy, Daddy! I want a little baby, too! Can we have one?" Bianca cried, letting go of Jasper's hand and running to grab her dad's leg.

"I'm sorry to interrupt," Jasper whispered, "but the baby needs to feed."

Rose stepped away from Edward's arms and she saw Jasper's eyes trained on Edward's when he wiped the tears from his cheeks.

She moved to get Sophie from Jasper and, hoping Jasper and Edward would talk, pulled Bianca by the hand inviting her to come back to the living room with her.

Jasper moved to leave, too, but Edward held his hand, saying, "I'm sorry."

* * *

Jasper still wouldn't look Edward in the eye. His head was low, his back slumped. "You have nothing to be sorry about. You made a decision, you stuck to it," Jasper almost murmured.

"Jay," Edward started but stopped as Jasper pulled his hand away, saying, "I understand it. I'll respect it. If you want me to stay away from your daughter, I'll understand that, too. I'll ask Rose—"

"It's nothing like that, Jay. Please, could you just listen to me?" Edward pleaded.

Jasper shook his head no. "I'm sorry. I know we'll meet again sometimes here, but please… just leave me alone. I told you already, I get it. You don't need to explain anything, I really don't wanna hear it from you." With that said, Jasper left the kitchen.

Edward stayed there feeling unable to move. He missed Jasper's smile, his scent, his warmth. He never stopped missing Jasper. Sometimes the feeling made him sad, sometimes angry. Now, he felt forlorn and miserable.

Edward walked to the kitchen table, sat himself on a chair and let himself remember his time with Jasper. The thoughts warmed his heart_._

_Edward was on his day off, just playing and joking with Emmett and his friends from college. Em had told him he was dating the girl of his dreams and that they would get to meet her that day. Edward had already met her and liked her from the start. She was so much fun to be around, but also a good friend—the perfect match for Emmett._

_That night, he saw Rose entering the bar accompanied by Jasper, who was walking with a nasty little thing attached to his arm—his girlfriend, Bella. He had never felt anything so strong, a painful pull to the man; his shiny brown hair, his delicate smile, his honest hazel eyes. From that night on he felt charmed by Jasper and even the fact that he was straight and had a girlfriend never made him back off. _

_His dreams were permeated by images of Jasper. _

_He thanked God Jasper's girlfriend decided she didn't like the 'vibe' at Emmett's and soon Jasper started coming to the bar alone. Edward noticed Jasper arrived close to his breaks every time. The two would talk and Jasper would drink. Edward would touch Jasper's skin at every chance he had. They would talk about anything and everything. Whenever Jasper didn't show up, Edward's stomach twisted at the thought of him being with Bella. _

_One night, at the end of his shift, Jasper showed up drunk as a skunk. Emmett had gone home and Edward was supposed to close the bar. He ended up closing after everybody left, but he and Jasper stayed behind. _

_Jasper was cheerful and funny when he arrived, but soon he started spilling his guts, telling Edward how Bella had been accusing him of keeping her distant, trying to avoid having sex with her, spending more and more time at an LGBT bar._

"_You know… the worst of all is that she's right. I'd much rather stay here than with her," Jasper confessed._

_They were both seated at the velvet burgundy couch and Jasper slid closer to Edward and laid his head on his lap. _

"_I never really liked fucking her all that much, you know. I always had to close my eyes and not really watch anything. I liked the feeling of her hands on me, her lips on my skin. I liked sticking my cock up her pussy, but… I don't know." _

_Edward was quiet, just listening to the man. Jasper turned his head and nuzzled against Edward's hip, rubbing his face on Edward's erection. Edward felt his face blush and feared Jasper would notice he was hard and would be mad at him. It was beyond his control at that point._

"_Last time we fucked, she pulled my head down her body when we were kissing," Jasper continued, "she made me… shit, she made me lick her pussy. Ergh! I hated it, every single second of it. I hated her moans when I did it. I felt disgusted. I had to make her come like that 'cause I couldn't will my erection back, you know." Jasper finished looking up at Edward's face. _

"_Why do I get hard every time I look at you?" he went on, startling Edward to no end. "Why did I enjoy your skin on mine so bad that night you pulled my shirt off while we were dancing? Why do I keep remembering your lips on mine and how your chest felt against mine when you kissed me? Your hands… your cock so hard against my hip…"_

_Edward's blood was boiling with lust for the man on his lap. Suddenly, he felt Jasper's fingers on the button of his pants. He let the man open it along with his zipper. With his fly open, Jasper slid his hand over Edward's hard on. "I wanna touch you... I wanna feel you… I wanna know if it feels as good as I imagine." Edward swallowed the lump in his throat and nodded._

_He felt Jasper's fingers against his skin as he pulled his briefs down freeing his cock. He knew he should be stopping the drunken man's actions, but he just couldn't._

_Jasper touched his cock tentatively. _

"_Beautiful."_

_Jasper pulled himself up on his knees, hooking his hands behind Edward's legs, moving them onto the couch, and placing himself between them._

"_I wanna see more," the man said, looking at Edward's cock and licking his lips._

_Edward folded his fingers around the belt loops of his pants, carefully pushing them down, freeing one of his legs. _

_He saw Jasper moving his right hand to his crotch, his left one resting on his bare thigh. Jasper's right hand ghosted over his cock and balls. "So fucking beautiful." _

_Edward's heart raced at the feeling and image of Jasper touching him."You shave your balls…" he commented, "…must feel so good." _

_Jasper's fingers finally touched him making Edward's back arch in pleasure. His breathing was erratic. Jasper slid his left hand down his thigh, cupping his balls as his right hand moved to wrap around Edward's length. Edward's lids fluttered closed—he knew he would come in a heartbeat at the sight of Jasper between his legs touching him. _

_He felt Jasper shifting on the couch. As he opened his eyes, he saw Jasper's head between his legs, felt Jasper's tongue stroking the side of his dick. _

_Feeling all the air escaping his lungs, Edward closed his eyes again. _

"_Fuck… you taste so good." Jasper said, his hot breath fanning Edward's skin making it tingle. Jasper's tongue kept roaming over Edward's stiff cock, his balls, his slit._

_When Jasper's lips wrapped around his head, Edward felt the coil in his stomach. _

"_Jasper… Jasper please, stop. I'm gonna come in your mouth, if you don't stop," Edward urged. _

_Jasper didn't stop. Edward burst inside Jasper's mouth, writhing beneath the god between his legs. _

_Jasper kept sucking on Edward's dick until it was spent. It was surprising how Jasper, as a beginner, could cope with the bitter taste of Edward's come in his mouth._

_Coming down from his high, he looked down and thought he'd never seen anything so erotic as his come dripping from Jasper's lips, and his tongue darting out to lick it._

"_I like it," Jasper whispered, "I want more."_

_Edward stopped Jasper from sucking his cock back to life. He pulled Jasper to his arms and the man laid himself on top of Edward, falling asleep right after. _

Edward's thoughts shifted to the first time he gave Jasper head, then their first time being naked together and so on.

He had to admit Jasper went from one thing to another way too fast. He'd broken up with Bella within six weeks of meeting Edward. They got together the first night Jasper showed up at the bar with the news of the break up.

Jasper started spending weekends at Edward's soon after, committing to Edward without a second thought. Jasper turned his routine upside down so he would mold his life to Edward's in every way he could.

Maybe that was why Edward hoped he would come out to his family as fast as everything else happened.

Maybe that's why Edward went so mad and desperate watching Bella walk around with her arm hooked on Jasper's at Emmett and Rose's wedding—he would never expect his man would do something like that without his consent.

It was a fact he'd had no reason to think Jasper would cheat on him with the woman. He had left her to be with him, going against all he'd learn about being a man.

He knew Jasper couldn't come out right then at Rose's wedding. However, Edward knew it was up to him to keep his distance, since Jasper could hardly keep his hands to himself during the tuxedo fitting.

Jasper was used to being persuaded to do things for his loved ones. Edward knew it well, for he was the one who mostly took advantage of this trait in Jasper's personality. Maybe Edward was too used to getting his way with Jasper.

At the wedding, it was Jasper's mother's request he couldn't say no to.

He felt a pang in his heart as he thought maybe the damage he caused when he left Jasper's home that last time was too great, and he wouldn't be able to fix things between them anymore.

As he sipped his wine, Maggie came inside alarmed. "Edward, Bianca is running a fever again."

Edward stood up, following Maggie to the bedroom where they had taken Bianca.

Her little delicate face was pink, but the girl was still giggling as Jasper knelt by the bed whispering something to her.

"Daddy!" she chimed, "I'm okay!"

As Edward approached his daughter, Jasper stood and stepped away to the other side of the room.

"I think it would be best if you took her to the E.R. Maybe she has an infection or something," Rose suggested.

Edward nodded, picking up the bag with Bianca's things and hanging it on his shoulder. "Let's go, baby."

"I don't wanna go anywhere!" Bianca complained.

"Baby, we need to check what's wrong with you," Edward said stroking her hair.

"No!"

Bianca started crying and lay on her side, turning away from Edward.

Edward huffed a little bit, and was surprised when Jasper came closer, looking at him as if asking for permission to speak to his daughter. Edward nodded and stepped back.

Jasper sat on the bed turning Bianca so he could see her face. "Munchkin, I think you should do what your daddy is asking you to, you know. Parents know what's best for their kids."

Bianca took Jasper's hand between hers, saying, "Okay, but only if he brings me back here after that. And only if we can stay and sleep over to open presents with everybody tomorrow morning. Please, daddy, please?" she ended, looking at Edward with pleading eyes.

Edward sighed, but the thought of sleeping under the same roof as Jasper was extremely appealing. Waking up to have breakfast with him was the cherry on top of the Sunday. He knew he couldn't expect more than just time around the love of his life. But time was more than he'd get if he went home.

He ended up complying. "I need to call a cab, I've been drinking," Edward commented.

"Jasper hasn't! I bet he wouldn't mind driving you," Maggie commented a little too excited for the occasion.

Jasper's jaw clenched; the vein that ran down his temple pumped stronger, but he nodded signaling he'd do it.

The tension in the car could be cut with a knife. Jasper remained silent. Edward rode in the backseat so he could keep an eye on Bianca.

Arriving at the hospital, Bianca asked Jasper to come along into the hospital and he couldn't deny her yet again.

In the hospital, Jasper remained quiet, only speaking when Bianca talked to him.

Edward observed their interaction and he felt butterflies in his stomach every time he saw Jasper glancing his way. At every time, Edward saw something flickering in Jasper's eyes. _Was it longing, maybe?_

When the three arrived home—Edward holding a sleeping Bianca in his arms—it felt so comfortable having Jasper by his side, he felt like they were a couple all over again.

Most of the family was asleep already. Only Maggie was still awake waiting for them. "How was it? Could they find out what's wrong with her?" Maggie asked.

"They said she may have caught a virus, but nothing we need to treat her with antibiotics. They said that she'll be okay in a few days," Edward cleared up.

Seeing Bianca was already asleep in Edward's arms, Maggie offered to pick her up and keep her in her room, since the boys would have to sleep in the media room—together.

Edward almost couldn't hide his excitement. He felt like he'd had a gallon of coffee—he'd be sleeping by Jay—by his Jay—all night.

They entered the media room and found their beds made—one on the sofa-bed, one on a mattress on the floor. Maggie's work for sure.

Jasper chose sleeping on the mattress, leaving the couch for Edward.

Jasper fell asleep the minute his head hit the pillow.

Edward was restless—he tossed and turned and couldn't forget who was sleeping an arm and a half away from him. Jasper's scent was all over the place, the sound of his breathing encouraging Edward to act.

Edward waited until he believed everyone had fallen asleep.

* * *

Jasper felt his blanket being pulled up and a warm body sliding into his bed, melding to his back. He knew who was there, caressing his arm tentatively, softly stroking his lips on his neck. His heart was beating so fast it was painful. He pretended he wasn't awake.

He thought Edward was sleepwalking and would leave him alone soon. He also enjoyed every second of Edward's body pressed against his back, he'd have to admit.

"Jasper," he heard the man behind him murmuring.

His heart skipped a beat—Edward was awake behind him. Still, he didn't reply.

"Baby, since you won't ever let me tell you, I'd rather show you what I want you to know."

Having heard that, Jasper felt Edward's hands caressing his abs, then his chest, his neck. When his hand reached Jasper's jaw, he pulled him to look at Edward. Jasper didn't open his eyes, afraid that it was a dream and he would ruin it by doing so.

He turned to face the man, though. He felt Edward hard against his hip, and his lips sprinkling featherlike kisses on his. "I want you… I need you back. I'm sorry I've hurt you, baby, but I'm willing to make it up for you, I promise," Edward whispered in between kisses. "I want you to be mine. I want to be yours. I want to go to bed by your side every night. I want to wake up by your side every morning. I want to have a baby with you, and watch you rock her in your arms the way you do with Sophie… I want you to marry me and be my husband."

Jasper finally opened his eyes and as he did it, Edward's green orbs burned him like lasers. He deepened the kiss demanding entrance, demanding Jasper to kiss him back.

At that moment, all the hurt and pain, frustration and sadness just vanished as if they had never inhabited Jasper's heart, and Jasper kissed Edward back with abandon.

His whole body responded to the stimuli it was receiving from the man he loved.

It was surreal. He thought he'd never have his love back. He never thought Edward would ever want him again—he wanted to marry him.

Jasper felt his body turn to jelly in Edward's arms. Suddenly, he knew what he wanted from his auburn-haired man. He wanted to belong to him, body and soul.

They started rocking against each other rhythmically, hands grasping, stroking, kneading each other's skin, hips rubbing, lips kissing, sucking, bruising in a frenzied dance until Edward slowed down his movements, pulling away from Jasper only a little bit, to look into his eyes, and ask, "Do you still want me? Really want me the way I want you?"

Jasper nodded, his eyes trained on Edward's mouth.

"Tell me out loud. I need to hear it."

"Love you… want you… forever." Jasper attacked Edward's lips, pulling Edward's boxers down, cupping his ass with both hands, driving Edward into him.

His words set Edward on fire. His gorgeous copper-haired love rolled his hips against his, pulling his briefs down so their cocks were free to rub against each other.

Jasper felt Edward sucking whatever bit of skin he could find. As they ground against each other, Jasper reached between the two of them and started stroking their cocks together. Edward arched at Jasper's touch on him.

"I've missed you… so bad it hurt. I'll never let you go," Edward said against his skin.

"Touch me," Jasper spoke, lifting his leg to give Edward access to his ass.

Edward looked puzzled for an instant, not really sure he understood what Jasper had asked— Jasper had never bottomed for him before.

Jasper removed his hand from their cocks, using it to guide Edward's hand to his backside.

"I want you to touch me. I wanna feel you inside me." Jasper's voice was shaking, but he wanted Edward to believe what he was saying, so he looked steadily into Edward's eyes while bringing Edward's fingers to his mouth, coating them with a generous amount of saliva, freeing them when he felt they were ready.

Edward hooked Jasper's leg around his shoulder, leaned down on him, kissing him senseless, as he felt his finger caressing Jasper's rim before breaching him.

"More," Jasper moaned, as he stroked their cocks together, his hips moving sensually at the feeling of Edward's finger sliding inside him. "More," he repeated as Edward's finger was gliding in and out of him in earnest. Edward inserted one more and Jasper moaned unashamedly.

Edward swallowed Jasper's moans with his kisses as he inserted a third finger and curved them to tap Jasper's prostate. Jasper felt like he'd been hit by a lightning that spread electricity through his nerves, making him feel fully charged with an energy he'd never had before.

Jasper quickly sped up the pace on their cocks, but let go of Edward's a few seconds before erupting, letting out a chain of 'fucks' and 'shits' rolled with moans and gasps as his cock shot his load onto his hand and their stomachs.

When he finally opened his eyes, Edward was looking down at him inquisitively.

Jasper didn't answer his silent question with words.

Coating Edward's cock with the come he had on his hand, he waited for Edward to remove his fingers from inside him and aligned Edward's cock to his entrance. "I want you inside me," Jasper whispered, still panting from his orgasm.

Edward was sweating, his tongue franticly moistening his lips as his breathing was harsh and labored. Edward rolled on top of Jasper, his left arm snaking behind his love's back, bringing him closer for a deep and long kiss.

As Edward's tongue was thrusting inside Jasper's mouth, Jasper felt Edward's cock head breaching his hole carefully. Edward was slow. His eyes were on Jasper's face the whole time. Jasper could see the love in them, sparkling, showing the emotion that was also making Edward tremble as he penetrated him inch by inch, until he was completely sheathed by Jasper's heat.

They rocked together gently, Jasper's cock springing back to life between them, as he felt his love moving inside him for the first time. It was so overwhelming. Painful. Burning. It was also so perfect, so right. He could hardly believe Edward was inside him, making love to him.

Jasper held Edward closer, almost not leaving any space for him to move. Jasper didn't want it all to end. It was all he ever wanted—Edward was his.

Edward moved his face to the side to give Jasper room to breathe. Jasper hooked his feet together behind Edward pulling him closer, needing him closer, deeper. "I love you, Jay… with all my heart, I love you," Edward panted, making Jasper's heart swell with elation.

Jasper knew what was about to happen once he heard Edward moan as he sped up his movements.

"Fill me. Please, fill me…" he begged.

A few more strokes and Edward came, his semen coating Jasper's channel for the first time. The feeling was so exquisite, Jasper's hand flew to his cock, pumping it urgently, making it erupt a second time, as his man was still thrusting into him.

Edward seemed unable to pull his cock from inside Jasper. Jasper felt his ass clench around Edward's cock, eliciting a desperate moan from his man.

"I don't wanna stop," he mouthed to his man's skin. That was poetry to Jasper's ears. He would be there for as long as Edward would want him. He could hardly believe he was in Edward's arms, surrounding him with his flesh, attached to his skin.

"Then don't," Jasper answered.

They fell asleep like that, entangled in each other, Edward's cock slipping out eventually.

* * *

"Daddy! Daddy! Daddy! Santa came and gave me what I asked him!" Bianca ran into the media room chanting to her dad. She launched herself on top of Edward and Jasper, who were still lying on the floor on Jasper's mattress, holding them close to her heart once she landed on the blankets.

Jasper looked spooked at Edward, suddenly very aware of their nakedness under the covers. He pulled the blankets closer to their bodies making sure Bianca wouldn't be able to pull them off.

Edward only shook his head no and smiled at his little girl. His happiness so evident his face was lit up like the Christmas tree in the living room.

"You didn't wait for us to open the presents, munchkin?" Edward gave a sly look towards Jasper as he used Jasper's nickname to refer to his daughter.

"No… I just had to open that door," Bianca stated, nuzzling Edward's neck, looking at the door.

"What do you mean?" Edward looked positively clueless to what she was saying, unable to even wipe the sleep from his eyes, since Jasper was trapping his arms under the blankets in a tight grip on the covers.

"I opened that door." The little girl pointed to the door she had just come through. "I opened that door and you were lying here with Uncle Jasper, holding him in your arms, sleeping. That means you are boyfriends, doesn't it?"

Since none of the men had the will to start speaking, she went on, "I asked Santa to make you and Uncle Jay fall in love like you had before. Grandma Maggie told me how you two were boyfriends before you met dad. I told her I'd love Jasper to be my daddy, and that I would ask Santa to make you two fall in love again."

With that said Bianca kissed both on the cheeks, lifted herself from them and left the room hopping cheerfully.

Edward rolled on top of Jasper and kissed him soundly, grinding himself against the brown-haired guy underneath him.

"God, I love you!"

Jasper and Edward walked together into the kitchen where everybody had started wolfing down their breakfast. They tried not to draw too much attention to themselves by not holding hands. But they couldn't stay away for long, so as soon as Riley laid his eyes on them, he shouted with a wide grin on his face, "Told you, guys. All you had to do was lock them up in a room and their dicks would point them to the right direction!"

"Riley!" Maggie yelled at her foul-mouthed son.

"We wanna see you guys kiss and make up!" Emmett shouted right after Riley.

Rose joined in. "Yeah! We wanna watch you guys kiss and make up!"

Jasper's hand reached for Edward's behind him, lowering his head, and saying, "We did that last night already… a lot."

"Whooooohaaaaaaaa!" Emmett howled.

Suddenly shy, Jasper turned around and buried his face in Edward's neck. Edward lowered his face to kiss his hair, pulling Jasper even closer to him.

As they were still embracing, they heard everybody clapping and laughing cheerfully. Bianca giggled in Seth's arms as Sophie started crying startled by all the fuss.

"I love you," Edward whispered against Jasper's hair.

"I love you more," Jasper replied, lifting his lips for a quick kiss.

* * *

**AN/** So... FINALLY! See what I meant? It felt like some of you guys had already read this chapter, and not only what Rose told Edward last chapter.

Thanks so much for reading! I hope you guys enjoyed it as much as I did writing it! See you soon! I hope! I'm writing something new, been for a while now, but need to finish it before posting.

Kisses to you all! And don't forget to tell me what you thought!


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